You might have some clients who are particularly struggling with despair this winter and at a loss on how to continue coping with the pandemic.
So how can you help them rediscover some of their internal resources for getting through challenging times?
In the video below, Miguel Gallardo, PsyD shares specific questions to do just that.
Ashley Vigil-Otero, PsyD conducted this interview with Miguel, and she’s already applied several of the ideas from this video with her clients. We think you’ll find them useful, too. Have a listen.
Now we want to hear from you. What stood out to you? How might you apply one of the ideas Miguel shared with your client? Please let us know by leaving a comment below.
You might also like to see:
When the COVID-19 Pandemic Leaves Us Feeling Helpless
Feeling Stuck During the Pandemic: Specific Questions to Help Your Clients
How to Help Clients Process Their Fears about World Events
The Same Pandemic, Vastly Different Experiences
I like this description of the “feeling of being wrong” when in reality the attitude and perspective may be a healthy and balanced one to what is an unhealthy societal event or situation. That is to say one feels so “wrong” that even an accurate perspective and response to an unhealthy situation is seen as wrong. I like to incorporate educating my clients on “self-regulation” in terms of the neurobiology processes. The three layers of the brain functions- fight or flight/amygdala, emotion/limbic and thought/PFC. If we understand that trauma was created by bypassing the PFC we know that language and “reasoning” will not help something that was not created by “reason” but by a visceral reaction. It gets trapped and needs to be worked out viscerally through relaxation, powerful spiritual experiences, yoga, mindfulness and meditation.
A message that came through this video is the importance to help our clients reflect on times that they were able to move through hopelessness… to move through feelings of helplessness. Those reflections on how they got through difficult times in the past can be very empowering to face challenging situations and difficult emotions in the present. These reflections help the individual to connect with their inner strengths and resilience. We can’t change the past… however we can reflect and learn from the past and also embrace the strengths we have demonstrated to move through difficult and challenging times. Thank you!
I am humbled by helplessness which in turn can transform into hopefulness. A very beautiful teacher once said, “when you meet the enemy, shake it’s hand and make it your friend, how an it be the enemy then.” Our resilience as human being lies in our innate ability to survive. The difficulty is in the moment, it feels like glue and we can get stuck. Our answer lies in the stickiness, it feels messy, and in that moment when we are in touch with the messiness we are connected to our resilience.
I’ve usually liked yr material, but here I felt suckered by the ad headline, “Specific questions to dampen despair.” There was very little of that.
This makes me a bit inclined not to open your future ads.
Marginal communities surely are strong in surviving and thriving traumatic situations. We have seen this many times in our community outreach work.
Talking to them about their previous way of coping a traumatic situation helps build their patience and persistence. They start moving from hopeless mode to helpless mode and start finding ways to bounce back.
I especially liked his emphasis on the difference between hopelessness and helplessness. He also showed clearly how to lead the person away from helplessness by asking how they may have endured other trials to give them hope and remind them of the courage and strength they have shown in the past . Thank you very much
Very Narrative Therapy
Positive comments & suggestions by Miguel & Peter Levine as always. I’ve have found that dealing with my own trauma past, that cognitive therapy may help a little to give support, but does little to resolve the trauma experiences for obvious reasons, mostly brain orientation & little body orientation, where most of the trauma results reside. From my experiences, trauma creates tension & shallow breathing in the body to repress/suppress those negative feelings that overwhelm the body & mind, & effect the nervous system, gut, respiratory system, etc., & the reason why energy therapies, such as EFT are found to be effective, depending on the severity in the patient, & the competence of the therapist & patient (on their own) to apply the Tapping points. Last & maybe the most important, in my view, is that when trauma creates shallow breathing, it reduces the amount of oxygen & blood flow throughout the body & brain, & thereby limiting both to function in normal emotional & mental capabilities. I am hearing more lately about the importance of addressing the shallow breathing syndrome, which is easy to do, by consciously breathing deeply through the nose, expanding the lower stomach, & breathing out through the mouth. Do in the morning when first waking up, at night before going to sleep, & any other times during the day, especially if you are feeling tired, depressed, lonely, or any other negative emotion you are aware of. If you become aware of your shallow breathing when reading, talking with someone, or any other situation, it is obvious that your mind & body are not in sync with each other & lessens your functional ability, which happens probably to most of us to some degree.
Jim Lentz…thank you for your informative comment—it was very helpful.
I found differentiating hopelessness from helplessness and helping my patients review their hx of overcoming challenging experiences in the past as ways to identify additional resources they may use now very helpful. Thank you for sharing this piece.
Wendy Hinch, LCSW
Several things stood out for me as very useful. First, the concept of a normal response to an abnormal situation. Also, differentiating helplessness from hopelessness and identifying resources, both within and without, that may give the client a sense of more control.
Yes as a client in therapy with multiple therapists now (all for different aspects of past and current traumas), I too found so much validation on how to be approached for successful ways I dealt with betrayals from years ago and how I can look to those things I did then to help empower myself to overcome the most recent betrayal (& trauma).
What resonates with me the most and gave me SUCH HOPE is that so many friends and family, though trying to be helpful, are upset at my response now with the betrayal, causal trauma, and grief because “I’m not being strong enough to just get over it.” This has been RE-traumatizing in that I’d started to internalize their judgments (wrongly). Pulling away from everyone now because I’m actually responding in healthy ways now by recognizing horrendous betrayal systemic tactics (unhealthy situations) during an already isolating pandemic, no longer listening to those insensitive judgmental blames, I’m now making a concerted effort to speak only to my therapists. Who keep assuring me—No this actually was terrible and you are actually responding the RIGHT way this time by saying No More.
I’m isolated like never before (even run off my social medias now), but I’m finally reflecting on how I managed so well before: on my own before Facebook friends, before Insta, before social media. Strictly with therapists and ON MY OWN. And that is empowering in itself. When you finally realize maybe I don’t need anyone else, family or friends, anymore to understand (since they can’t) that I have triumphed before on my own, therefore I CAN and will DO IT AGAIN.
TY for this much-needed message.
The comments here are as good as the presentation, especially Sara Brown and Joelle Zeidan. We need to all expand beyond our conditioning and training. We need, each of us, to reclaim our own authority. We need to unite psychologists, counsellors, coaches–the best and to become better yet together. United is not a glib word. It must be UNITED in TRUTH and LOVE and ACTION. Bless this kindred tribe. Thanks RUTH.
Totally agree, especially with females who need to know their power in life and in their ability to create miracles. Feel there is also a growing stigma surfacing with agism. Glad you are all working to stay united for truth, kindness and justice. People on here can make a huge difference on the lives of so many. Glad for all your hope in the future plus the wonderful miracles you have aided in your healing profession.
I am Metis-American. White/Natives from Canada and Irish who came over and suffered violence. Our trauma is white and war related. Lost husband in line-of-duty and great-grandfather in war. Father, brothers, uncles all traumatized by war, generation after generation. Today white males are being marginalized. My kind of white people. Those who have struggled for survival. My brothers had to leave our state years ago due to affirmative action. My niece gets kicked out of university buildings because she is white, even though her father used his hard earned retirement to pay for her education and most of our kids can’t afford to attend. Maybe you will start to see many more of us. Latins are over-represented in the military, the most wonderful people and they give more than they get but I am tired of my people being accused and labeled and being blocked out of some schools because there is no check box for “mostly white” but not born with “privilege.” I don’t even condemn the privileged. They certainly cannot grow without struggles. Forgive my ignorance. Just a little alarmed at all the division critical race theory causes. Critical means criticism of what people cannot help, the color they were born. As for Latins, they look white to me. Coming from where I am, they look just like us. Never knew any different until it came to politicians and university professors accusing me of racism when I didn’t even know what that was. We were never racist in my area of the country but we watch it on TV and it never goes away. Such an unhealthy obsession. Thanks for letting me vent. I came to this podcast because there is such helplessness when the Democrats take over and crush people back into poverty. Delete this if you want to. Thanks.
Wow. Not sure what else to say here but wow. Colorblindness helps no one.
This Practitioner, along with all other practitioners, I have the choice to see whomever they wish.
Accepting it is what it is, not fighting it and enabling client to think back to their own skill sets and resources that they and their historical families used to survive during adversities.
Spoken like a true social worker, as part of our curriculum focuses on human rights and social justice and how lack of, impacts mental and physical health.
I would like to add to Dr. Gallardo’s excellent and too rare insight and practice, that to a lesser extent this applies to most of us.
And ironically, although these were 99% white people, many who belong to racist groups, Dr. Gallardo can apply some of his philosophy to why we just had an attempted coup d’etat.
For too long our politicians and corporate news have manipulated the public and has indoctrinated them to believing that up is down and down is up, and all that matters are your guns, prayer in school and abortion is evil.
Not enough people are connecting our politics (and culture at large), to the reason why the US is experiencing an obesity and drug epidemic. Not enough people are connecting environment (home and politics), to depression, anxiety and inability to thrive.
Our culture (through psychiatry and pharma), says, just take a pill, and instead of massive massive education about neuroplasticity, exercise, relaxation strategies, most still linger on the disease model- even for addiction.
If you are LGBQ, an upper class woman who was just denied a raise unless she sleeps with her employer, a 50 y/o white home health aide, or struggling artist that has to work 2-3 jobs to get by, you too struggle with deregulated surveillance and corporate capitalism, that is literally killing our country.
Our culture is a very sick one, both physically and mentally, America thrives on numerous different types of violence, be it the violence of prejudice or the violent video games and movies, the equating of guns with being patriotic, resulting in massive shootings not seen in any other industrialized country.
I am so thankful that we can find voices like Dr. Gallardo, Gabor Mate, Robert Youdin, Lance Doddes, VanDeKolk, Davidson to provide a more in depth analysis and treatment for what is ailing Americans.
Thank you for posting strengths-based perspectives that remind clinicians to tap into clients’ resiliency. I love working with clients to find the “exceptions”. They are often able to lift themselves out of despair right before my eyes with this one paradigm shift.
Just one thing: thank you also for these words:
“Healthy responses to unhealthy circumstances”…
Humans are unfortunately designed to function in the survival mode so therefore kind of “short-sighted”.That is why we see the immediate future threat but not the ones that are always in our present lives. Same applies for human sources that could be fenefited further if we care to look all of the tragedies that happened in the past but handled by “taking good care of each other and compassion and collaboration. We need a real”global solution” for a real “global problem”
Good idea to look at the past to predict the future regardless of time. Thanks.
Dr Levine‘s exercise to ease despair is very helpful and useful.
It’s very helpful to look to history of clients and this way also to resources and skills they have. Sometimes in this covid 19 lockdown everything was focused on the things they
can not do.
I particularly appreciated the idea of helping a client discriminate between hopelessness and helplessness, not taking in the difficulty of the situation as personal. Drawing on past experiences of resilience (personal but also from the history of their community as part of decolonization if it applies) also stood out for me.
the cross cultural aspects of therapy in practice. My immediate reaction; we need to hear more from therapists of color who can contribute. Thank you.